My Name Is
by Miss Murderess
Summary: I am myself, nameless in my mind all but for a few titles picked up in my lifetime. To the world you may know me but you know nothing of who's in my mind.  There's more behind a name than you may know.  My name is Cloud Strife.  Oneshot.


Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Oneshot, random babble about names.

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What's in a name? The idea may differ from person to person but what we question will always be the same. Is it simply something in which we call and recognize our fellow man; or is it something deeper, more meaningful than such. Perhaps it is the name that signifies everything we are or maybe it is the shield in which we hide everything we have become.

When we are born we are given a name chosen by the ideals of our parents and as we grow we try so desperately to fill in the person behind the name; to give it meaning and to make it ours. A name means nothing without the strength of the one behind it as well the man without a name holds nothing in the minds of his peers. Nameless is forgotten while those with a wrongful title are looked down upon and disapproved. So we fight ourselves and hide our truths deep down to create an illusion to the world where we can be accepted as the person we are supposed to be while hiding reality right behind the shield created by mold of our name. We hide, afraid to reveal ourselves to the world outside. So we take to our minds living with a dual dialogue admitting only what they want to hear while always silently reminding ourselves of the truth and who we really are. We live for so long in the shadows of ourselves that sometimes we lose who we really are to those who we have pretended to be.

Sometimes, and sometimes we lose the will to hide behind our self made facade only to earn skeptics and distrust in return. We become ourselves, the true person we are inside and we are met with the cold, uninviting arms of the ones we hide from for so long. They look at us with an eyebrow raised, surprised at what they see. They ask us who we are and where we've gone but they don't believe the truth. Sitting here watching through the same eyes as the one you've always known; we held back just to be accepted. Now as you sit before us demanding all these answers we laugh to you and we die inside knowing we can't truly be acknowledged. So life goes on and we hide again inside our dark and empty selves until we are released again or taken by our mind's own hell. So who am I you ask, even sometimes I do wonder. I am myself, nameless in my mind all but for a few titles picked up in my lifetime.

A cold table beneath my body sharp tools under my skin; I lay nearly dead waiting for my long due death only to be pushed away. He laughs at me, my weakness and failure. I wanted to be strong, to live up to my name and forget my inner self. Now, here I am unable to do anything, my shortcomings shining through; his voice is wretched as it rings through my mind but at this point it hurts less than mine.

"Pathetic boy," he says as he rips apart my body, "Who are you?"

_My name is Failure._

"My name... "

I lost myself, both sides of me; they were torn from all I knew. This man beside me now dead and cold his soul is gone for good. I can't remember and I don't know why; who am I supposed to be and how can I make this pain subside. The sorrow of my weakness, my failure and my mind ate away at my memories pushing them deep into dark depths. I need to know who I am and where to go from here, I must have strength where now there's none; I must become anew. Looking at the torn up man full of bullet holes and blood his deep violet eyes peer deep into my mind, almost begging the question, "Who are you?"

_My name is Zack Fair..._

"...Is..."

I've come so far to seek that man with green demonic eyes; I chased him to hell and back as well across the planet. I fight him with hatred I can't explain, I am drawn to him without much reason. I tell myself it's for revenge, to destroy the monster once and for all; but why is it that in a moment I can obey his every word? As I sit in sadness and sorrow at the loss this man has caused me he laughs and runs away; yet still I have to follow this man as I pretend revenge.

_My name is Puppet._

"...Cloud..."

Lost inside my own dark mind, a conscious cracked and hidden; but this woman right beside me guides me to the light. She shows who I have always been, even through my constant hiding. Because of her I find myself locked away amongst the mess and now I can continue living with some understanding. She saw behind my mask, my lies and ripped them from my being; so here I am beside her now walking hand in hand. No longer hiding, I am free from all I feared, she picked my up when I was down and accept all me weakness. So as I walk proudly forward I feel as though I can finally smile, I can show the world my real self and I can finally say,

_My name is..._

"Cloud Strife"


End file.
